First Mother's day

Being that Mother's day has come and gone, I have a few thoughts regarding the statement "just a stay at home mom". I learned to hate this saying!!! There is a negative connotation to this saying! The word "just" shortens the whole statement! Moms are such bad asses! They push out a baby for starters and then have to take care of this baby from the get go. Women are instantly put into many roles and become a nurse, a cook, a chauffeur, a coach, a maid, a teacher, a tutor, entertainment, laundress, and within those things there is like 50 more things that they have to do! All while trying to raise children to be civil out in public. The word "just" does not simply cover all of these roles! This sentence makes everyone think that a mother just sits around the house and does absolutely nothing. Just sit on the couch and binge watch Netflix for hours on end. (Although lets be real...sometimes binge watching Netflix is totally a must some days!) It shortens the mothers ability of what she really does from day to day. I have realized this, and I was one of those people who looked down at women who were "just stay at home moms". I looked down on them and thought that being such a thing was the worst thing for me to be when I was "older".

Side note: I never wanted to get married. I was never one of those girls that dreamed of getting married to "Prince Charming" and living happily ever after. I never really wanted a family either. In fact mormon guys hated how much I did not want any kids and broke up with me because of that reason! haha! Lame I know! I never thought that being married and children were in the cards. Plus I never really was that young woman that loved baby sitting! In fact after a certain incident, I swore off babysitting!! And no need to run to Tyler saying all of this to him, he already knows, and in fact he never wanted to get married anyway (he wanted to be that cool rich single Uncle)...and yet here we are! Married and have twins! JOKE IS ON US! haha!!!

So now that I am a actual stay at home mom, living in California where this profession rarely exists. I learned to say that I am a VP of Domestic Affairs. Which totally fits and gets rid of that stupid saying. It's the 21st century, this whole "just" thing needs to be kicked out the door! I say that I am the VP because my husband is also the VP. There is not just one president of the family that makes all the decisions. Parenting takes two people in a family.

All in all, this is my little rant. A rant that I have been thinking about for a while now, and just need  to get it out. Mothers are more than "just" and they need to be celebrated and loved! I wouldn't change my first Mother's day for the world. I love all of my boys, and wouldn't change my job as a VP for the world.

Our first beach trip. Overall good experience, minus the cold. 

Birth story: Nov 10, 2017

Since the last post, I was admitted into the hospital for monitoring on my high blood pressure. Not really thinking much of it I called Tyler who was at a camp out with scouts that I was on my way to the hospital. He did not have good reception and all heard was basically "hospital". Tyler quickly left the camp out and met me at the hospital. I was admitted into labor and delivery ward where they just monitored me for a few hours and then I was able to go home. We then went about the next day pretty normal, until later on in the day when the doctor called and told me that she wanted me in the hospital again that day for monitoring. I then asked her for how long and do I need to pack for a long period. She then went on and told me that this monitoring will be for a longer amount of days because my body is basically sending signals that it is having issues with the pregnancy and my onset illnesses that I have been diagnosed since getting pregnant with the boys. Tyler was at work and right after I got off the phone with her I called Tyler immediately and told him that I am being admitted yet again! This time we would have to stay for a longer time. So, while Tyler was trying to leave work, I started to pack all the things that we needed for our stay at the hospital. I will admit, my nerves were getting the best of me! I think I packed literally everything and anything because I have never stayed at a hospital for long periods! I'm not one to get very sick and stay for long amounts, so I didn't know what to pack!!! Tyler ended up meeting me at the apartment and finish up the rest of the packing.

We finally got to the hospital and walked in the doctor told us to get admitted through the front and they will then tell us where to go. The guest service desk was busy helping another person and we were just standing there waiting to be helped. The person then stopped talking to the individual ahead of us and asked if we were in labor, to which we replied "no". Then he asked, are we here for a c-section? Again we replied no, and said that we need to be admitted to the hospital my doctor told me that I needed to be admitted. The guest services then called someone on the phone, I think it was labor and delivery and was telling them what I told him. Somehow there was a miscommunication, and we ended up in labor and delivery telling them the same thing as the guest service people downstairs. Basically when guest services sees a pregnant lady, they get all panicky and don't think or even listen because we weren't supposed to go to labor and delivery! We finally got to where we needed to go which was the antipartum wing. The nurses at antipartum were waiting for us, and was asking us information when they couldn't find me in the system...wonder why?!?! They then told Tyler that he has to run back down and go admit me downstairs! Basically what we were trying to do in the first place! But, whatever...we finally got through that issue. Now, basically the waiting game, we waited until the next day when the doctors do their rounds. The doctor basically said that we are not going to leave until we have the babies. My body was basically getting  tired of the pregnancy and that it was safer for me to be in the hospital than for me to be released and have something horrible happen outside the hospital. So there we sat, waiting for a few days in antipartum on bed rest. We (meaning me and the twins) got a few steroid shots to have the boys lungs develop  I was only able to leave my room twice that week! Once when I was able to take a shower and the other when I was allowed to walk to labor and delivery. IT WAS THE BEST WALK I HAVE EVER DONE!!!  Now that we were in labor and delivery, they got the ball rolling. We ended up calling both sets of parents to have them come because we didn't know when delivery day would be but we knew that it was soon!

Us walking from antepartum to labor and delivery! 

For the next five days it was nothing but tinkering with my body, to push it into labor. All of which ranged from something simple to major complex and painful! (I'll save you the details, but if you really want to know...just ask) Finally on the fifth day the doctors decided to push my body and give me a time deadline. If I was not in "active labor" by 4pm then they were going to have to give me a C-section. And that is around the time they put me on pitocin. As time went on they increased the dosage, they pushed the dosage every few hours. I went to the highest dosage and was asked if I felt any contractions that the monitor was showing, To which I replied no, and was holding up conversations while supposedly having those "really bad contractions". The doctors decided to give my body a break and take me off of Pit for a few hours and in the meantime decided to puncture holes into the sac to get my water to break. So, every movement that I made, I was leaking water. Those few hours passed quickly and they again started me on Pit. The second time around was when I started to really feel the contractions! I really didn't feel the contractions in my belly though, I felt them more in my back, and for some strange reason I felt pain in my shoulder. The only time that I have that pain on my shoulder is if I'm running and cramping...which was weird. One of the nurses suggested I take fetanyl to help with the pain, because I didn't want to take the epidural yet. Man was fetanyl a good drug! haha! It knocked me out and I had good sleep while these contractions were going!

I was slowly dilating and was only able to take fetanyl one more time. I think I lasted a few hours when it came to me calling for a epidural. Cause man, I have a high tolerance with pain but those contractions were not giving me a break! They came in with vengeance! Tyler, my mom, and in-laws were all there in the room. All I remember was telling Tyler "epidural" in the middle of a contraction. He left the room to get a nurse and came back in. I swear the anesthesiologist was a genie because he just flowed right in with his equipment. I don't remember what he was saying, because I could not stop shaking! I was so nervous because, ummm...WHO WOULDN'T BE NERVOUS ABOUT A NEEDLE GOING IN THEIR BACK?!!! The only thing that I could remember him talking about was something about his family and twins, I tuned him out. So there I was on the foot of the bed bending over. He told me the things that I would feel, all the while this nurse told me to breathe and relax. I let out one breath and relaxed to which the anesthesiologist was telling me that what ever I did to relax, to keep it there and all the sudden I heard this "pop"! After that, he taped me up and the drugs kicked in. From here it was really just a waiting game. In which we only waited a few more hours and few checks from the nurses and doctors later, I had this urge to push...like I needed to go to the bathroom type push! I didn't say anything to anyone because I wasn't 100% sure what kind of push it was. All while I was trying to figure it out my mom was looking at me and asked me what was going on. I said I think I need to push! To which my mom told Tyler (or someone) to go get the Dr/nurse. They came in and told me to push a few times in which after that the Dr. said "lets go!" This was when chaos ensued, nurses came in, I started to shake again, parents were crying, Tyler got thrown scrubs and I was being wheeled out. While trying to be wheeled out, my IV got caught on the curtain or something, I'm not sure. But, that led to me being yelled at by the doctor to "Use your words"! We then went straight for the operating room. (This is because twin births can get complicated and they wanted to play it safe in case something happened) The doctor broke my water and with a few pushes, Os was born! They quickly put him on my belly and then he was gone. I told Tyler that he should go see Os and make sure he was okay. He did not scream at all like when babies were born. In the meantime the doctors and nurses were getting ready for Wywys. They told me whenever I started to feel the contractions and when I was ready to go ahead and tell them I wanted to start pushing. Well I really didn't feel any contractions and I was talking to the doctors about me graduating with my Bachelors degree and what I wanted to do with it (haha! jokes on me!) So, I asked the nurse that was next to me if it was okay to push. She told the doctors, there was a big splash everywhere when his water broke, and 45 minutes later Wywys was born!  Tyler came back in time to support me with Wywys birth. He was such a trooper in the OR.

First family picture with Wywys!

Side note: I am so glad that I gave birth at Good Sam! With the doctors and nurses that were there all the time, I truly believe that they were rooting us all on. At one time one of the nurses said she had to fight other nurses off in order for me to be on her shift! It was kinda fun to know their schedules, and to build that kind of relationship with them. When we found out we were pregnant with twins we went to a specialist that deals with high risk pregnancies. Those doctors were awesome as well! They knew their stuff and was very honest with us and answered all of our questions if we had any. Now we didn't see one of those specialist doctors until we were in the OR! We saw the doctors that were doing their rotations in labor and delivery. I think we saw all of them and I quickly hated one of them! She was not gentle at all and was very blunt and straightforward. Which was funny because I was hoping and praying that she would not deliver the boys! Aaaannndd SHE DID! hahaha how ironic! She delivered the boys and the next day she came into the room and told us that she told the specialist to basically back off because he was ready to cut me open! We were really grateful when we found out that she stood up to him. Because normally the hospital doctor answers to the specialist doctor! (a little blessing in disguise there)

Os in the NICU

If you all follow me on FB, you know that the boys were in the NICU for a week. Which was the best and worst thing ever! It was literally baby boot camp! We stayed up late looking at the boys in their little incubators after I gave birth, when the doctors gave me the okay that I could. We told the nurses that we will be there for the feeding in the morning (being determined parents that we are). We ended up sleeping in! Tyler wheeled me into the NICU, and this one nurse turns around and was like "where were you?!" Saying that to a hormonal new mom was the best thing ever...NOT! This nurse and I pretty much did not have a good relationship after that. I ended up avoiding her and her shifts almost the whole time the boys were in the NICU. While I was battling that, Tyler (bless his heart) was the most amazing dad! Seeing him be so tender and loving and determined to get those boys healthy enough to take them home was just an amazing thing to watch and witness. I remember coming into the NICU one time and Tyler had both boys on him at the same time! I cried like a baby because that was the first time that all three of the boys were together outside of me!

Wywys under the bili-light with his eye protection

After five days, (it felt like months) we were finally told that we could take the boys home! It felt like a dream! Like any minute the nurses would say, "just kidding, they are not ready". In order for us to take them home we had to sign so much paperwork and it literally felt like we were trying to break them out of jail or something!

Grammy meeting Os the next morning

Later I found out what happened to the boys. The reason why Os was whisked off so fast and why Wywys was as well. While Tyler was walking to the room where Os was, he found out that he had the cord wrapped around his neck twice. Which was the reason why he did not cry. We did not know that Os had the cord wrapped around his neck, the ultrasounds did not show this at all. Os didn't show any signs of distress either! Wywys we were able to delay cord clamping. One of the nurses mentioned that he had a true knot on his cord. He was in the NICU for other purposes. I also learned that I gave birth medicated and unmedicated . Os was medicated and by the time Wywys came the medication ran out. I did not know this until WAAAAYY later!

I know some of you might not be religious but we know that god had his hand in this pregnancy. It was truly a miracle that both boys are here and are so healthy!

Os on the left, Wywys on the right

And if you are wondering if I have ever gotten the boys mixed up? I have never gotten them mixed up...yet!

If you must know...

Its been about 4 months since I have posted on this blog. As you can probably guess, there has been a lot going on in those four months! I'll get to the birth story later, because really these boys did make a grand entrance that should have a post all in itself!  These boys are nothing but fun! They recently have been rollie pollies! As soon as I put them down for tummy time they quickly flip over! This happens a few more times until they tire and cannot do tummy time/flipping over anymore. They are also quite the social bug too! They smile at anyone that says "hi" to them, and its stinking adorable!

Also, we had a 4 month check up a week ago and the boys are growing right on schedule!

Wywys is 13lbs 12oz.

 Os is at 14lbs 3oz

Now that I think I have caught you all up...the reason for this post is to answer any and almost all questions that we get about these boys. To hopefully reduce any and all questions that get repeated over and over again. But, who am I to think that this would reduce anything...probably not. 🙄

First Question...Are they twins?
- Yes, yes they are twins. Sometimes I like to answer with a smart-alic answer and say that I just wanted to carry a extra car seat around for the heck of it. Or the only reason that I have a extra stroller is to run you over with it!

Which follows up to the next question...are they fraternal or identical?
- They are identical! If you look in the past posts about the boys even the doctors said they are identical. They shared a placenta! I have had so many people tell me that there is no way that the boys are identical... THEY ARE IDENTICAL! I have seen the placenta, it was one placenta and two cords coming from it. It was not two placentas that were fused together. Yes, there is a few things if you look closely at the boys side by side there are a few differences. But, they are still identical! No, you cannot persuade me otherwise. I know they are identical!!!
  - Also, no twins do not run in our family. The best part is that identicals are a fluke in nature. No one knows how it happens it just does. So, FAMILY...there is no way that you can have twins just because we pulled that card. It doesn't matter if twins run on either side of the family 6,000 years back. If they are fraternal, that would come from the mom..not the dad. There's no way that fraternal babies can come from the dad...he cannot lay eggs...so...no.

Are they boy/girl?
-Ok people...if they are opposite sex...meaning one is male and the other is female, is that the same?! NO! Identicals are either boy/boy or girl/girl. If it was boy/girl, the girl would be severely handicapped and most likely would not make it without medical help.

The statement, "2 for the price of 1"
- No, it is not two for the price of one. Yea, maybe the pregnancy would be one but everything else is two for the price of two. Two car-seats, two swings, double the clothes, double the diapers and wipes...I can go on and on here and I think I made my point!

Oh one that makes me laugh all the time is, "do you breast feed?!"
- First off, that's like really personal to ask anyone so maybe don't ask. And if it is any of your business I do both. I breast feed and supplement, gotta keep those chunkers chunky!

And the statement "your hands are so full" while they intently stare at us with wide open eyes as if they are in shock at the circus that is in front of them.
- Why yes my arms are full, as you can clearly see. I wouldn't change it for the world though. And while you are staring at me I will just stuff this food in my face while holding a very wiggly 4 month old and try not to spill. Also, yes, I have a dog that I plan on keeping..hes mine and he is tolerating the chunkers.

Another question we get asked is "Are they natural"?
- Well they came as a surprise if that's what you mean...but other than that  they came from my vagina 🤷 and I'm not going to answer that.

Oftentimes we get completely stopped while shopping and they will say, "Oh my gosh! My great aunts uncles niece is a twin..."

Overall, I know everyone's heart is in the right place, but man some of these questions are really personal. Sometimes I enjoy talking about my boys to strangers. Other times it gets old how many times I get stopped in a store and I just want to get the heck out! In all honesty, I am just writing this in here for safe keeping. (whether you read it, or hate that I'm writing this) Cause you know being a mom you often forget things and when you actually try to remember its too late. Yes, we are enjoying this chaos and would not change anything!